TRILLIONAIRES FOR TRUMP
The Trillionaires of this country need a President like Donald J. Trump.
A man that doesn't let truth get in the way.
A man who looks an eclipse directly in the eyes.
A man that doesn't let the American Constitution or Supreme Court tell him what to do.
A man that doesn't let dozens of felony and sexual assault convictions stop him.
A man that understands that people's needs should never get in the way of a lucrative business deal.
A man who knows that the best people to regulate an industry, are the monopolies and billionaires who cheat regulation.
A man who's not afraid to tell everyone, over and over, how he's the best at everything, can fix everything, and that other people are no good at it.
A man that will do whatever it takes to make sure things go his way, and he stays out of jail.
Unbridled Capitalism FTW
It's just how it is, don't even question it or we'll call you a socialist, a communist and anti-American.
Continuing our ceaseless and wasteful thirst for throwaway goods and services will power the world until it kills it.
There is no better way we could run blindfolded into the future, trust us.
And even if you disagree, Citizens United v. FEC ensured we can buy every election from now on, so your voice doesn't matter anyway.
Consume.
Oligarchs Are Your Friend
In America, people are only rich because they are smart and work hard. It has nothing to do with their family, who they know, luck, a lack of empathy and how willing they are to step on others, and the benefits of a corrupt system.
Stop questioning our immense wealth for doing very little, and the corrupt laws that allow us to make more; while you and half of America work paycheck to paycheck to survive. Who knows, you may be a billionaire some day too!
Sleep.
Solving Problems is a Problem
If we solve problems, we have nothing to complain about in the next election.
The border, guns, taxes, poverty, ad infinitum have worked well for decades.
While people are focused on the lies, conflicts, wars and problems we created, we can game the system, fill our pocketbooks, and keep the investigations off our corrupt actions.
Forget.
Eeeeek! Run Away!
All the bad people and immigrants steal elections, eat dogs and cats, and control the weather! The Radical Left™ is evil and is forcing your children to wear dresses for their Satanic DEI rituals!
We only lose because a bazillion illegal mail in ballots are cast in every election!
Don't believe your eyes and pocketbooks. Everything is going great, and we are Making America Great Again. We are not insane and dangerous, and anything that isn't going well is Biden's fault. Or Obama's.
Fear.
Join Us!
All we ask is for you to ignore your common sense, and your undying and unquestioning loyalty, children's future, and money.
What a small price to pay to exalt a man so wonderful as the esteemed Mr. Donald J. Trump.
In return, he will grant Trillionaires like us, whatever we want, ensuring our continued enrichment and control of power in the world.
Yay!
- Member Sign In
Membership Plans
Choose a membership plan that fits Trump's needs.
- Low Energy Level
- Signed photo Picture of Mr. Trump, signed by a staff member
- 1 email Personalised email account at ILuvTrump.ru or trumpBff.kp
- 1 domain Access to 1 domain that Mr. Trump sits on so people don't make parody sites
- Endless The Chance to Support Mr. Trump
-
₽ 100M
per month
- Friends of Putin Level
- Trump Vault Complete access to Mr. Trump's New and Improved "Secrets" vault
- Trump Tower One free week at Trump Tower (mini-bar not included)
- Pardon One free pardon; your own Get Out of Jail Free card!
- Endless The Stain of Mr. Trump
-
₽ 250M
per month
- Big Mac and Covfefe Level
- Contracts No bid construction project for your company (payment not guaranteed)
- Access Personal, frameable invite to King Trump's coronation
- Secretary of State Secretary of State position, and a brand new self-driving* car!
- Endless The Cons of Mr. Trump
-
₽ 500M
per month
John Barron
Vice President of Trump Organisation
Helped to bring President Trump to the Forbes world through sharing alternative facts about Mr. Trump's wealth and assets.
In doing so, helped in establishing his name and gaining access to funding and resources.
These lies, and the President's continued mastery and career in professional lying, would allow him to become the constant, overwhelming, and powerful force that you can't freaking escape, that he is today.
John Miller
COO
Publicist and friend of the Great and Powerful Trump-Oz.
Knows first hand of Mr. Trump's attractiveness to women and his great, great, great wealth.
He is so attractive that Madonna called and wanted to go out with him, that I can tell you.
Believe me, I am certainly not Donald Trump and you're a bad and stupid person for accusing me of lying. Or maybe I am. Or maybe I am a joke, and you're a loser who can't take a joke.
Carolin Gallego
CFO
Former Secretary for Mr. Trump.
I do not believe any man in America gets more calls from women wanting to see him, meet him, or go out with him.
The most beautiful women, the most successful women—all women love Donald Trump.
I am more than likely, just another pseudonym used by Mr. Trump to respond to an article where a mean person spoke poorly of him and hurt his feelings.
